Juggling family and jobs can be a challenge. We asked the experts for their tips on getting it right. By Liz Jarvis
Whether you go out to work or you work from home, trying to find enough hours in the day to fit everything in, plus your kids, your partner and of course some time for yourself can often seem like an impossible challenge.
Jools Aspinall works full-time as a Team Manager for a mobile phone company. She and her husband have two sons, ages 15 and eight.
‘I have a lot of guilt around working,’ she says. ‘Time at home is often fraught as we try to get everything done in a limited time while still trying to make the ‘quantity’ v ‘quality’ argument work in my head. I’ve recently removed access to email from my phone as I was constantly replying to emails from home.’
Mum of two Keira O’Mara, one of the runners-up in the Tesco Mum of the Year Awards 2012, runs an at home business Mamascarf. ‘Getting the balance right can be a real struggle at times,’ she says. ‘Juggling a business with two children means work can spill over into evenings and weekends.’
The key to a happy work/life balance, say experts, is knowing where to draw the line.
‘More and more of us are finding our working lives and our home lives are blended together,’ says Nadia Finer from the networking site More To Life Than Shoes. ‘If you work from home try containing your stuff to one small area. If you’re in an office, try to leave your work brain at home. And whatever you do, when you’re not working, stop checking your emails.’
Often when we’re working so hard it’s our personal lives that get neglected. ‘Build time into your diary for quality time with your kids, partner, your family or friends or yourself,’ advises Nadia Finer. ‘Once it’s in the diary, don’t move it, change it or cancel it. Even if you’ve got just 30 minutes a week to go for a run, soak in the bath or do your work you’ll feel a whole lot better for it.’
Joanne Dewberry is a mum of three children under five who runs party bag business Charlie Moos and also offers tips and advice to working mums. ‘I am the mum at soft play with notebook in hand scribbling away, I do hang my washing out at 9 o'clock at night and I block book as many meetings as I can back to back when my children are at pre-school. I breastfeed and type with one finger, or conduct phone conversations.’
To wind down properly, you need to prioritise your non-working time, says Jessica Chivers, author of A Mother’s Work. ‘Try not to spend it doing domestic chores. Give your children your full attention for ten minutes within five minutes of coming home or switching off your computer for the day. Keeping guilt at bay and children happy is not about the quantity of time you spend with them but about how responsive you are when they want/need you.’
And if you find yourself feeling guilty about neglecting your work or family life, remember all any of us can do is our best – so give yourself a break.
Top Tips to Help You Get the Balance right
by Nadia Finer
1. Buy the Brownies
The pressure is on to be a mini-Nigella, baking brownies all day and looking fabulous while juggling work with a beautiful family and home. It’s almost impossible to live up to the superwoman stereotype, especially if you don’t have a celebrity style entourage to do your childcare, housework, cooking and personal styling. Let some things go.
2. Maximise your impact
So much to do, so little time. Everything on your list is fighting for attention. What to do? Make the most of the time you have. Work out what is going to have the biggest impact on your goal and do short, sharp bursts of it when you can. Stop faffing around with little and bobs that won’t make a difference to your outcome. Ask yourself, does it matter? If it’s not important then don’t do it.
3. Flick the switch
Do you tweet and text, whilst watching TV, thinking about work, cooking dinner and checking Facebook. We’re not making it easy for ourselves to relax. It’s like we’re addicted to multitasking. Spend 10 mins every day doing nothing. Breathing in and out. Or, if that’s too hard, try for doing just one thing at once. We don’t want your head to explode!
4. Ask for help
Delegating is tough. But ask yourself if only you are really the only person who can do what needs doing. If someone else can do it, give them the opportunity to help.
*What are your top tips for getting the work/life balance right? Share them below.
